


french vanilla think I should sit this one out! (maybe a cup of self control would be the route)

by apearu



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Killing Game (Dangan Ronpa), Coffeeshop AU, Fluff, M/M, Not as bad as the last tag made it sound, Ouma is a tiny liar, Ouma lies and Shuichi fears for his life, Slight OOC for shuichi maybe, cute little oneshot, sorta canon kokichi characterization?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-01
Updated: 2020-06-01
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:08:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24495472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apearu/pseuds/apearu
Summary: “Ta-Daaaaa!” Kokichi declared, smiling widely at Shuichi’s shocked expression. He flung his arms out to either side of him as a sign of triumph. “See? There’s no way you’ll be able to drink this!”It wasn’t a sky-high pile of sugar on the cup. It didn’t have mustard and ketchup on it, and it didn’t have grape panta in it as far as Shuichi could tell. All that was in the cappuccino cup was plain coffee, with a small heart-shaped swirl of milk on the top. Slowly, Shuichi’s eyes slid back up to Kokichi, who was giggling quietly in anticipation.“Kokichi… what is this?”“Awww, you don’t know what this is? It’s just a plain little cup of coffee!”((title taken from lyrics of Jack Stauber's "Coffee"))
Relationships: Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 4
Kudos: 100





	french vanilla think I should sit this one out! (maybe a cup of self control would be the route)

**Author's Note:**

> My first fic I've ever posted, written a few months ago, heh. Kokichi doesn't know how to deal with confessing feelings and I can relate. A lot of dialogue, in fact the majority of this is dialogue, so the formatting is very spaced out, sorry. Extremely stupid fluffy fluff. (The best kind. Might be a little cheesy! You have been warned.)

“Heeeey! Shuichi! Get over here!” Kokichi shouted, making sure the concoction he’d prepared was completely hidden underneath the counter. This time, he swore, Shuichi would  _ finally _ be defeated. “I got another for you!”

“Again?” he heard Shuichi sigh from a corner of the coffeehouse, before the telltale shuffling of papers and the screech of a chair as he got up. He always seemed to be annoyed whenever Kokichi called him over to taste test a drink, but not once had he ever refused.

And today, Kokichi would take advantage of that.

“So? What is it this time?” Shuichi asked, resting an arm against the countertop and cocking an eyebrow at Kokichi. “You’ve been giving me all kinds of horrific drinks all day, and I’ve drank every single one of them. No matter how….” 

He grimaced, most likely remembering the last mix of tomato sauce and espresso with sour cream that Kokichi had whipped up. “ _ Interesting  _ they may be. Don’t you think it’s time to give up- whatever you’re trying to get me to do with these?”

“Nee-hee hee! Absolutely not!” Kokichi grinned, leaning in close to Shuichi and tilting his head. “I promise that you won’t even be able to  _ look _ at this one, much less stomach it!” 

“A-Ah, um…”

Before Shuichi had a chance to even begin forming words, Kokichi pulled the drink out from under the counter and slammed it down in front of the detective, coffee splattering over Kokichi’s checkered apron and onto the formerly pristine granite.

“Ta-Daaaaa!” Kokichi declared, smiling widely at Shuichi’s shocked expression. He flung his arms out to either side of him as a sign of triumph. “See? There’s no way you’ll be able to drink this!”

It wasn’t a sky-high pile of sugar on the cup. It didn’t have mustard and ketchup on it, and it didn’t have grape panta in it as far as Shuichi could tell. All that was in the cappuccino cup was plain coffee, with a small heart-shaped swirl of milk on the top. Slowly, Shuichi’s eyes slid back up to Kokichi, who was giggling quietly in anticipation.

“Kokichi… what is this?”

“Awww, you don’t know what this is? It’s just a plain little cup of coffee!”

“Then what was all that about me not being able to drink it?”

Kokichi had to cover his mouth to stop Shuichi from seeing him bite his lip in anticipation. “Nee-hee hee! You’ll seeee!” 

He watched as Shuichi shook his head and reached for the cup. Just as his fingers were about to close around the handle, however, he hesitated.

“Hang on. Are there sedatives in this cup?”

Shuichi received no answer.

“Or... laxatives, or something?”

Kokichi remained silent. 

“Kokichi,” Shuichi demanded, pulling his hand away from the cup, “answer me! This isn’t funny!”

“Do you trust me?” 

The question slipped out of Kokichi’s lips before he could stop it. He’d fantasized about asking Shuichi the question many, many times before, but always refrained. He knew what the answer would be: a resounding  _ no _ . After all, ever since Shuichi had first walked in the door of his coffeeshop, he’d done as much as he could to make sure the detective would never come back. Of course the answer would be no. He squeezed his eyes shut in embarrassment. How could he just let it come out of him?

There was silence for a while. Then came a long exhale from Shuichi, followed by soft clinking noises. Curious, Kokichi cracked an eye open to see Shuichi draining the cup quicker than Tenko drank her sports drink after a workout. He set it down with a slight grimace on his face, eyes closed and face scrunched up like he’d just eaten a lemon. Which he had. There was the juice of about three squeezed lemons in that cup. When he finally opened his eyes and relaxed his face, though, Shuichi couldn’t help but laugh.

“Kokichi… lemons? Really?”

Kokichi Ouma had only one weakness: the laughter of Shuichi Saihara. It was warm, it was gentle, and it completely melted him. It made him soft. He felt his face begin to heat up against his own will. If Shuichi saw him…

_ I need a distraction I need a distraction I need a distraction- _

_ Aha! _

**CRASH!**

“Kokichi, what the-”

“AHAHAHAHA!”

“Why would you just throw the cup at the wall like that?”

“Because  _ screw you,  _ that’s why!”

“Are you sure you just didn’t want me to read the message in the bottom of the cup?”

Kokichi’s heart nearly dropped into his stomach.

“Wh-what?”

“ _ I love you. _ ” Shuichi colored gently, averting his eyes. “If it’s not a lie, which… I’m fairly certain it is, that was… pretty straightforward for you, Kokichi.”

_ Oh god save it save it back out NOW _

“Nee-hee hee! S-So you saw it, huh?” Kokichi sighed, as dramatically as he could make it. Worked to bring out the groan of resignation in that one bit of breath. Worked to do what he did best. 

Lie.

“MWA-HAHAHAHAHA!” Bursting into maniacal laughter, Kokichi prayed he would be too shocked to notice the slight tremor in his voice. “I guess I’ve been caught! Shuichi Saihara is the one I love~”

Shuichi’s face darkened another shade of red. 

“It’s too bad though. That  _ was _ really just a lie. If I really diiiiid love him, I wouldn’t have put poison in his cup.”

“Huh?”

“Yuppers! You’re going to die in approximately…” Kokichi looked at his wristwatch as he scrambled to come up with a timeframe, and then popped back up to give Shuichi a wide grin, “Thirty-seven minutes if you can’t find the antidote!”

“Wh-What? Kokichi, I-” Shuichi looked up at him, a confused expression of betrayal showing on his face. “That’s a lie… right? You’re lying right now, aren’t you!”

“Mmmm… nope! I am one hundo per-cent telling you the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth right now. Don’t you feeeeeel the poison coursing through your system? Oooh, I bet that feels awful-”

“I  _ trusted  _ you!” came an outburst from Shuichi, ( _ god that hurt _ ) and Kokichi knew that even if the detective was smart, the threat of death looming over him was probably enough to scare him enough to make him fall for it.  _ Perfect.  _

“Nee-hee hee!” Laughing at Shuichi’s face of what was quickly turning into panic hurt too. Nearly too much. But he continued with the game, as it seemed Shuichi had indeed forgotten all about the earlier confession. “Well OBVIOUSLY you shouldn’t have! I am a liar, after all! Of course, I might be lying right now, too…”

“A-Am I going to die-?!” Oh, oh, he was panicking. Shuichi seemed out of his mind with fear, which… Kokichi supposed that yes, that was a normal reaction to being told that one had just consumed a cupful of poison. “Kokichi,  _ WHY?! Why would you do something like this?! _ ”

Kokichi just shrugged. “Yeah, probably. Also, I told you I was evil. No reason. Besides!” He leaned across the counter, tapping Shuichi lightly on the nose with a finger as the detective reeled back. “I didn’t force you to drink that cup. It’s your  _ own _ fault you didn’t take that warning seriously.”

_ God, why was he like this. WHY. _ Kokichi begged himself to stop, to tell him the truth and that he was lying, but no matter how much Shuichi’s hurt look stabbed at his conscience, he couldn’t bring himself to force the words through his goddamned lips.

“I-Is there an antidote?!” Poor thing was shaking a bit now. Kokichi cursed himself for his inability to just say that he  _ fucking lied and that he was sorry _ . He hates liars the most, after all. 

“Aww, it’s too bad.” Kokichi curled his face into a miserable pout. “I don’t really know what’s in it. But I  _ doooo _ know I have one dose that came with the poison when I got it in the back storeroom.”

Shuichi pulled himself up onto the counter, staring Kokichi in the eyes. Oh jeez, he really fell for it. The thought of death really did make fools out of people sometimes. Kokichi forced himself not to look away as Shuichi pleaded with him. “Give it to me. Let me back there. Please-!”

“Well, I might’ve been lying then, too! You might spend thirty-seven minutes searching for an antidote that doesn’t even exist!”

Kokichi was expecting a sob, or begging from the detective, or some sort of even more painful expression that he would have to force himself to meet with a smile. What Kokichi was not expecting was for Shuichi to grab the front of his apron and hoist him up to eye level.

“Gh-”

“Where. Is it.” He demanded, more scared than forceful. The grip on his apron, however, tightened, yanking him further off the ground-  _ just how strong was this guy?! _

“Okay okay-” Kokichi wheezed, getting flashbacks to when Maki had done the same thing when he’d put salt in her coffee after she insulted him while ordering. “I-it was a lie. There’s no… poison in the coffee.”

Shuichi released him, hands shaking, and Kokichi sucked in a deep breath. 

“Why… why do you do this to me?” Shuichi asked, staring at Kokichi, still rattled hanging onto the counter from behind. “Is it- fun? For you? Fun to mess with me and make me think I’m about to die?!”

“Mmm…” Kokichi pondered, bringing a finger up to his chin in fake consideration ( _ no this one was so much worse than all the mundane pranks _ ), “...yeah! It’s really, really fun. I should do it more often!”

Shuichi just shook his head and let out a long exhale, slumping against the countertop.

“I swear, that’s the last time I’m coming here. I’d... prefer not to fear for my life every time I order coffee.”

“Aww, but it’ll be so  _ boring _ here without you!” He whined, trying desperately to mask the desperation that  _ really _ shouldn’t be present in his voice.

“You’ll live, Kokichi.”

Shuichi made to gather his laptop and papers, and Kokichi couldn’t help but sigh internally. He really  _ did _ like having Shuichi around, as much as he... hated to admit it. But he would never apologize. He couldn’t, and he hated himself for that too. But that wouldn’t stop him from...

“Hey Shumai!” He called, coming out from behind the counter up behind him as Shuichi opened the door to leave.

“Shumai?” Shuichi turned around in confusion, a light redness visible across his face, “Wh-mmph!”

As he had turned around, before he could rethink the decision, Kokichi leaned in and kissed him lightly on the lips. He could taste lemons and coffee from the awful drink he’d been given before, but Kokichi didn’t care. Just as fast as he had gone in, Kokichi pulled away from Shuichi, who was left sputtering in even more confusion, shock, and was now a lot more red than he had been at the nickname.

“Wh-Wha- Huh????” 

“Nee-hee hee! Well, if I wasn’t gonna see ya ever again, I had to!” Kokichi was a little red himself, smiling up at the detective who he had  _ finally _ gotten to show his feelings for… even if it was after he had lied about attempting to murder him. His heart was soaring. “Y’know how I lied about liking you? Yeah, me lying about that was a lie too. Heh. Good, right?”

“I- K-Kokichi!”

“Now get outta here, ya dumb dumb!”

And with that, Kokichi shoved Shuichi out the door and into the snow, shutting and locking the door behind him before turning around and sliding back down against the glass, laying on the floor against the door with a light blush, and a wicked, extremely happy grin.

  
  



End file.
